Waiting, Waiting, Waiting

Oh the waiting!!! It is hard at times, and at times I feel very at peace. I was trying to think of a good analogy to describe the waiting process to those who have not adopted, and I think I came up with a good one!!

Imagine that you decide to go eat at your favorite restaurant. After careful planning and consideration, you choose the exact place where you want to eat. But wait!! First there is a credit application (application to the adoption agency) to make sure you qualify to eat at Cafe Adoption! Good news- this application only takes a week or two to process!! Yay you passed!!! You get in the car and start to drive over. The drive is like collecting all the paperwork for the dossier. You hit some bumps and red lights, and finally have all the paperwork you need to check in! You arrive to the Cafe Adoption, and walk to the hostess stand. How long of a wait, you inquire. It depends on eleventy billion factors, the hostess tells you. First I will put your name on the list, and review your paperwork to make sure it is in order. When I call your name to seat you at your table, you know you are halfway there (dossier to china or DTC!). You give the gal your name and find a seat. You look around. Oh My. This place is crowded!!! You occasionally hear a name called and see someone yell excitedly and go to their table. Oh wait! Your name is called! You run to the hostess stand, and she tells you that one of your papers has to be re-done (in our case Scott's health form). You want to curse. You actually drive to your friend's house and cry and rant on her shoulder for a while. Then you jump through 45 hoops to get it done as fast as possible. Finally all is ready and the hostess calls your name and takes you to a table!!!! (wahoo!!! Log in Date or LID baby!!!)

You look around the Cafe Adoption, and see other people in various stages of their meal. Some are eating dessert and coffee. Some have only water, and look like they have been seated forever! You start chatting with those nearby, and get to know where they are in the process. You even find a few people on a similar timeline, either slightly ahead or slightly behind you!

Then it happens! Your waiter brings you an appetizer. This is what you have been waiting for! You have been matched with the plate that you specified way back when you filled out the application. (Letter of Intent filed, and Pre-approval for your child is granted!) And this is when it gets fun. The next wait for Letter of Approval (LOA) is crazy. Right now it is running 60-120 days (I am on day 62, but who is counting???). Oh look- the people next to you have gotten their mesal! You congratulate them and ask how long they waited. 137 days??!!!??? You hope you don't wait that long. Another family gets their meal- they only waited 25 days. That timeframe is much more like it! And then the waiter comes by and teases you. He whispers that the chef is working on your dinner now (or that your dossier is out of translation). He tells several people around you the same thing. You are excited to have this progress news, but are upset that your good friend, who was seated the same time as you, and got their appetizer the same time as you, did not hear the waiter whisper yet. That family there was seated way after you, and they are already on dessert!!!!! No fair!! There seems to be no real line, and things happen in spurts.

Finally your meal arrives (LOA!!!!!!!) You know that dessert is pretty much coming in 10ish weeks. First there is more paperwork, then you must be invited to have dessert (travel approval or TA), then finally dessert arrives. You have to sign the final bill (no one complains about the final paperwork in China though, I promise!!) Then you leave to begin your new life.

The LOA wait is crazy, and it really happens that those on the same time-line can get ahead or fall behind.

The Chinese government is on holiday this week (Happy Mid-autumn Moon Festival everyone!!), and there have been rumors that they cleared their desks on Saturday before the holiday. We found out that we were out of translation on Friday. For our LOA to be on the way from China that means our dossier would have had to be reviewed in one day. Not likely. It would take a miracle. It would take a miracle to get our LOA by October 15^th which is probably the latest date for us to get it to be able to get our Claire before or at her birthday. Keep praying!!!

An update on Claire

We found out that Claire is in foster care in a big city, and has been since a month after she was found. This is wonderful news because foster care tends to be better, and that is how she was probably able to have her lip fixed already. The best part is that I found pictures of her from last year on their blog!!!!!!!!!!  So here some are!

 Here is the youngest pic we have

 This is soon after her lip surgery

 Happy, laughing Claire

 Look at that sweet chunk!!  She looks like a good eater

Making silly faces!

Introducing Claire Yuting

Here is our beautiful daughter! This picture was taken when she was 13-14 months old and she is now 20 months old. I know you guys want some info- so I am going to share!

In January she was 19.5 pounds and 26 in tall. (so anyone want to guess what size clothes she will need??)

She likes to be held, and we knew she was ours when we read that she does not like to sleep (she is like her brothers already!!)  She does not like to be by herself (just like our Noah). She is a good eater (also just like those brothers!) The nannies said that she is extroverted, impatient, and loves music.

She had her cleft lip repaired on Scott's birthday last year.

She will be 2 on December 23. We would love to either be in China then or have her home by then- but that would take a miracle. We do know Someone in the miracle business- so we are asking for this selfish prayer to be answered, and would love everyone to pray with us.

Before we travel- there are several steps. China first has to approve our dossier and they will send a Letter of Acceptance (LOA) when that happens. This is the step that pretty much determines when we will travel. Travel usually happens about 10-12 weeks after LOA. Soooo if we want to travel 12-15 then we would have to have LOA by the first week in October.  China usually takes 3-4 months to issue LOA- so getting it that soon (2 months from our dossier getting to China) really will take a miracle.

Before we travel we have to come up with the rest of the money. So far we have paid about 6K in agency fees, 1150 to the chinese government, 620.94 to UPS for sending the dossier all over the place, about 650 dollars to get the various seals on all the dossier papers.  That is close to 8,500 so far.   There can't be much left, right???

Well, we have one more agency fee- 2,200, the orphanage fee 5,500, plane tickets 4,000 (we are guessing- 2 round trip and 1 one-way!) in China travel 3,300 (hotels, plane tickets in China, cab fares), Spending money for China 3,000 (food, tips for the guides, and money for various paperwork that has to be done in China. This is what our agency says to bring, and if you want a bunch of souvenirs to bring even more!)  So that is about 18,000 we still need. This also does not include the time I will take off work- I don't get paid if I am not there since I work part time, and the deductibles and co-pays for Claire's medical needs.

Obviously we are scrimping and saving. I worked extra this summer. We don't buy many "extra's" including cable TV. We don't eat out unless our parents treat.  I tuck away some cash every time I get paid. We are collecting all of our change in  a big jar that will go toward the spending money in China. I am borrowing a suitcase and a jacket from friends when we travel.

We are doing a huge fundraiser- and we really could use more help. If you want to help-let me know. We are doing a both hands project- http://bothhandsfoundation.org/scott-and-kathy-gilreath  We are repairing a widow's house and the workers send out flyers asking for sponsors for the day. The money goes to help fund adoption expenses. (Both Hands disperses the funds to our agency- we don't just get a big check).  We still need workers to help that day, and we need addresses to send the flyers to. If you would be willing to share you Christmas card mailing list or whatever- please let me know. If you want to donate- you can do that on our project page. We do not want to take away from ministries that others already support- and those not interested will just throw the flyer away and not think twice about it. But every dollar helps- even if someone sends in 5 dollars instead of spending it at starbucks- we would be grateful.  So help an orphan and a widow and join in!!!! It will be fun and rewarding, I promise.

I get to mail Claire a package. I am including a photo book so she will be able to look at her family. Hang on our little Claire Bear. We are coming. Hopefully soon!!!!!

LOI has been sent!

What is a LOI? It is a Letter of Intent to adopt a specific child.  This year for our anniversary, our agency gave us the best gift ever. Here is how it played it:


My phone rang. Colorado area code. I thought they were calling to tell us not to get our hopes up for a referral for that day.

Me: Hello
her: Hi! this is P with your agency. Happy Anniversary!!
Me: thanks!!
Her: I really am calling with a referral.
Me: Are you sure???
her: laughs. Yes!! But she is younger than you thought- but we have not gotten any files on older kiddos recently. (she then describes the kiddo) Do you want to see the file?
Me: YES!!!!! (as I burst into tears)


So I forward the file to scott, read the file, see the pictures, crying the whole time because I Know I am looking at my daughter.  Poor scott had a work emergency and couldn't look for a whole hour.

So we did a flurry of paperwork, including the letter of intent. The LOI will be sent to China, and China will send us a PA (pre-acceptance) that we are matched. When we get PA we will be allowed to post pictures- so there will be a huge announcement with pictures and her name in about a week!!!


So she is beautiful. She will be 2 in december. She has several medical needs- her biggest is cleft lip and palate. Her lip has been repaired but her palate has not and probably won't be fixed in China.

We are soooooooooo excited!

Waiting, waiting, and more waiting.

The Chinese Child welfare center entered our dossier into their computer system on 8-2!! (so that is our LID or log in date).

Now we wait for a referral. We pray it will come soon, and that the first file we see will be our daughter.  The waiting is very hard. I think it is so hard because I know she is over there, and I don't know if she is hungry or getting enough medical care, and every day that goes by is one more day she will have to spend there.

How does it work? The referral will come from our adoption agency. They receive files and match the files up with the medical checklists they have on file.

How long could it take?  We could get called tomorrow. We could get called next year. Our agency thinks we will not wait too long because we want an older girl, and we are open to multiple medical needs.

So what are we doing while we wait?  We will be focusing on our Both Hands project!! We are meeting with the widow this week and will be setting a date. Stay tuned for that!!

Timeline

I thought I would write out the timeline of where we have been, and where we have left to go.

Application approved by our agency 2-8-12

First agency meeting 2-23-12

Homestudy complete- 5-10-12

I-800a receipt date- 5-14-12

I-797c Approved- 6-19-12

DTA- Dossier To Agency- 7-6-12

DTC- Dossier to China- should be soon!!!!

LID- Log in Date - date we are entered in China's computer system

PA- Pre- approval once we accept the match with our daughter. This means she is locked in to us.

LOA- Letter of Acceptance- this means we have been 100% approved to adopt her

I-800- More US immigration stuff

Article 5- US immigration and chinese visa stuff

TA- Travel approval- when china officially says we can travel

Travel dates!! I can't wait to be at this step.


So how much longer??? Well if we are DTC soon and get an early august LID, and a match soon after, we could travel anywhere from mid december- march.  usually travel happens 4-7 months after matching. Right now the longest wait will be for the LOA. That has been taking anywhere from 60-100 days. So if it is 60 we will travel sooner, if it is 100 it will be later.

We could be matched in 2-4 weeks. I can't wait to see her picture. We are 99% sure we have decided on a name, and we will tell everyone what her name is when the match is official. 

One good thing is that I will be busy the next few weeks. I am working extra because my coworker is out on medical leave for a few more weeks, Noah starts kindergarden, and we have a good lead on a widow for our both hands project.

Beach day!!!!

 We went to Jekyll today- Noah has been asking to go to the beach. The boys loved it- well after Aiden got over his sunscreen in the eyes incident.

 Aiden kicking the water.

 A wave got them!!!

 Excited smiles right after!

 Close up of Noah

Close up of Aiden

Both boys loved the water and we couldn't get them out! It was a great day- calm and hot. No jellyfish and no riptides.